leahmarie

I am sitting here, just finished my stationary bike session…spent 30 minutes on a moderate setting, did 10 miles, burned 500+ cals  and then did a 10 minute cool down on a lighter level doing an extra 2 miles……but what is really making me happy is, I am drenched with sweat, and I feel AMAZING, AWESOME and ALIVE! The three best A words I can think up right now

I feel on top of the world, and in complete control of my body and life….I am so happy

But you know the whole time I was doing my work out, I was thinking of you guys, thinking of my buddies, thinking of all of us on this journey, we can sooooo do this my friends!You all have touched my life and have helped me stick with the changes, every day I look forward to getting on here, reading about you all, your ups, your downs, all that you openly share, helps so very much….

So thank you to all you beautiful women who have helped me beyond words (whether you know it or not), I thank you so much and look forward to sharing in success with all of you!

Be true to the Beautiful you!!!!

Ok off to hit the showers!
Peace ALways,

Leah♥

Ah so glad Christmas is over and we can all get back into some kind of normality. Glad to report that I did not over do it this year in the food department. Christmas was wonderful, we didnt do an overly huge one, I like to keep it small so the kids know there is more to Christmas than what you get….the kids all loved their presents, and I was so happy to watch their little faces light up as they opened their gifts, lots of happiness, and man it truly makes the world go round.

So after Christmas morning I was happy, only calories I had so far into the day was from my morning coffee….My Grandmother came and we all went over to have a nice little get together with her and my parents and brother, so then came the food…..My grandmother had snacks all laid out, but she is really good at keeping it pretty healthy, I had olives ( I loved the really big green ones stuffed with jalapenos), celery, cheese, tortilla chips and triskets dipped in humus, and cottage cheese, and just half of a cookie…so I snacked moderately since I was hungry, then my mother showed up  with her wonderful Tijuana Slop….its like an enchilada casserole, I was full from my snacking and was only able to eat half of the scoopful I put on the plate…so that was surprising…usually I would snack to the point of overload, and then still grab a plateful and force it down….

I noticed food has always been big in my family…I think I learned the habit of eating for comfort from my mom, I think I have pretty much gotten rid of that habit, thanks to Buddy Slim, you guys are so awesome and help me stay on track, I make sure I do my food log every day and that is helping me to no end, I am so happy to be apart of this awesome site!

Anyway, after the gathering we went home, I ended up drinking a little Brandy and relaxing with my man, then I broke my no night grazing rule (using Christmas as an excuse) and had some more triskets with a little cream cheese….that was the first (and last) time I have broken that rule since I made my pledge to stick to it….

So that was a great Christmas in my book of memories…..the next day my mom gave me her exercise bike that had been pretty much just collecting dust…..I love it! yesterday I did an hour on it, doing 20 minute shifts… I found a nice moderate setting, got my heart beat up, and it felt so good to break a sweat, so I am addicted…every day I am going to put in at least an hour….a great way to burn calories….the bike has a heart rate chart and a button that checks your heart rate when you hold it down, it also counts calories burned, regular and fat, it has a timer and a speed and distance tracker to, so its really useful. I am very happy with it, I already got in 30 mintues today…I wanna work up to more, since I am going from no exercise to the biking and belly dancing, I dont want to hurt my self  as I am trying to fix myself

I am feeling really good, really happy…..so weird, my attitude has changed so much, I use to struggle with depression really bad, but every time it starts creeping up on my I can get rid of it, with a few heartfelt affirmations….learning to love myself was the hardest change I had to make, funny how that should not even be an issue, but with the way society is today, everyone feels so insecure, I wish I could change the world, there shouldnt be little girls with eating disorders, each year it seems as if it starts younger and younger, now you hear about bulimic 7 year olds, wake up society, something is terribly wrong! I could rant for days…

I can really feel a change, not just in how I feel, but how I look, and even how I feel about how I look, lol…I hope you all know just how special you are, and I wish for everyone  to look  inside themselves, find that inner you, the one that you might have forgotten about long ago…..be true to yourself, love yourself, really love yourself….then you really can take on anything…even if its baby steps toward your goal, any progress is better than none

Enjoy the last little bit of 2008….no new years resolutions about losing weight this year for me, my new years resolution is to bring some happiness to each day of 2009….and it feels so good to not have to worry about my weight, and make lame resolutions that I will just break and beat myself up over….instead of worrying about my weight, I know that  I have a healthy lifestyle now and I can stick to it, and everything else is just going to fall into place…

*Peace Buddies, You all rock!*

♥Leah♥

*Marry Christmas Buddies*

I just felt like blogging this Christmas morning about how happy and thankful I am with my life….I layed awake last night thinking about being 26 with a family of my own, and then my mind travelled around the world thinking of all the other young mothers out there, the ones in thrid world countries, ones in snowey Finland, rich and poor and all the others in between.

While many could look at me and label me poor trailer trash since we do live in an old mobile home on the poor side of town. I am disabled and we live month to month on a small fixed income.  I am sure many judge me while I am out and about, look at the fat girl in those old jeans, with tattoos and facial piercings, I am sure many label me and judge me as not as good as they are…..that doesnt bother me any more….I mean if one ever took the time to actually get to know me they would meet a family full of love, who may be poor but we are not trash, my kids dont run around the neighborhood dirty and causing problems, they are always clean and fed and most important happy, I may live in a trailer but we do the best with what we have.

I am truly thankful for what I do have, I have a stable roof over my children’s heads, warm blankets and beds to sleep in every night, food in the cupboards, clean water to drink…toys and entertainment for the family, clean clothes to wear every day. Financially may be tough, but at least I know my kids will be taken care of, any extras are always a blessing. But I see so many families, who live day to day, who may have money but they aren’t happy, their homes arent warm and full of love, so yes I am so very lucky!

Some mothers dont know when their babies next meal will be, are if they will live to see tomorrow….Some mothers wander around looking for a safe place for their child to sleep,dig in rotten trash to find one piece of decent food….some families are waiting in a hospital room, hoping and praying  to hear the news that their special little baby will live to see another day…..so I am so very thankful for what I have, I am rich on so many levels, our lives are special, each and every one of us, and I am so happy to be alive to enjoy all that we recieve….

SO I wish for you all to be happy, feel blessed for every thing you have, feel blessed for every smile on the lips of your baby…

Peace be with you my friends!
Leah Marie

Back from the appointment and so happy to be able to report to you I am a 5 pound lighter me, woot, been dieing to see my little moon move on my tracker hehe..It may not be a giant leap to my goal, but I was just oh so happy to see a smaller number than  before. Helps to keep optimistic and just happy for any progress.

On a health wise level, my blood pressure was a bit high for me, but my PTC is remarkably under control for how long I have not been under any doctors care, maybe its doing so good because of my lifestyle change and the slow decline in my weight. Ah to know I am doing the right thing finally feels so good! But maybe I should really get into yoga to help me keep my blood pressure down.

Kids just got home from school, an early release day to start their 2 week vacation. They will keep me busy, I am the kind of mom who runs around cleaning up after the kids all day, like the house maid hehe, but I choose to  be that way because I refuse to be lazy, I have a lazy demon in me, he also makes me procrastiate a little too much, but I fight him and get into my cleaning and caring (or serving hehe) for my kids and my man. So doing all the cooking and cleaning and all the fun stuff us housewives do helps remind me how good it is to get off my butt!

I saw on a Wife Swap that one mom wore leg weights around the house to burn more calories, I am thinking about trying that, I wanna have those long sexy legs of mine back, time to come out of these layers, or rolls, and be my true me again!

We can do this, every day is a new beginning! Every moment is a chance to create a smile and spread some light!

So Smile on girls, the journey just got a little easier!
Peace,
Leah♥

*Be true to your inner you!*

HI All, uhg, I was without my beloved internet for 2 whole days! I was actually kind of afraid to be with out this site! But I made myself pretty proud and stuck with my routine, well with the exception of the two cookies I just had to have today hehe! But oh how I missed you guys, this site has changed my out look so much in such a short time! 

 Yesterday it snowed! We got about 4 inches in our yard, it snowed all day yesterday and it was awesome! Kids got out of school for today, I am crossing my fingers and hoping they get to go tomorrow, they are having their Christmas parties tomorrow, so I hope they get to go, the snow is mostly melted today, but its always awesome to see the snow in the desert!

Tomorrow I get to go to my neurologist,  get to see how my PTC is and we get to talk about options and care, but I am really looking forward to getting on the scale at the office (cant believe I just said that!) since I dont have one at home yet, I am dieing to know if I lost even just 1 pound! So I will be weighing in when I get back, cross your fingers and send me some luck girls!

The babysitting job is over, I miss those little ones already! Their Mommy was so happy to see them. But having such a little baby around for so many days, reminds me how much I appreciate my sleep at night hehe!

The belly dancing is still on, I even practice the moves I learned while I am cooking and cleaning and stuff around the house, well I do it when I think no one is looking, but my man usually catches me, probably more often than I like to think! He is so encouraging, but then I guess any guy wouldn’t mind seeing his woman dancing around for him.

I am so much happier in my skin, and I feel a twinkle of self confidence coming on, what a strange and wonderful new feeling!

I Hope you all are having a beautiful Thursday, you wouldn’t believe how much I thought of you guys while I was with out a link to the net!

Anyway I am off to do the dishes!

Peace Always!
Leah♥

*Always shine like the beautiful star you are!*

I can not believe I waited this long to start something so amazing and so fun!  I just finished  45 minutes of beginners belly dancing sessions thanks too ExpertVillage.com.

I cant believe how awesome I feel, even though I worked up a sweat, this is so amazing! I have always wanted to learn belly dancing and I am so glad I finally started! I dont know why I waited so long, but thanks to all the inspiration and  tips from reading so many of your blogs I got off my butt! Thank You, Thank You!

I plan on doing the bell dancing every day, it feels so good to move my body, right now I feel so energized, my muscles are humming, so this is what it feels like to be alive!  I sometimes forget that I am only 26, I think for some reason I have been tricking myself into believing I am over the hill, which makes absolutely no scene to me now that I am waking up, moving around, seeing that I can still move my body in all kids of ways is a real inspiration!

I dont know how much longer I would have stayed in some crazy hibernation if I wouldnt have found this site, I mean wow, this site rocks because of all of you out there willing to share your highlights and your down falls, motivation and inspiration around every corner here, thanks again so much!

I really recommend belly dancing, its great, and it does wonders for your self confidence when you realize how you can really move your body.

Be beautiful, be you!

Peace Always,

Leah♥

I have been looking through blogs, gosh this site is so awesome and inspiring, you all are so awesome here on Buddy Slim! So I figured it was time to challenge myself, a new challenge to make this journey a little more interesting, and so i can create yet another good habit to replace a bad one!

No more nighttime grazing!

Last night I decided to make this change……it seems like when the kids go to bed and its so quiet and you turn on the tv for a little relaxing time, you cant help but to grab a snack, at least that’s been my case, though over the pass 6 months I have changed that late night grub fest from junk food to not so junk food like whole grain cereals and popcorn, but it just needs to stop all together, I realize that I dont need all those extra calories before going to bed.

So last night was Day 1, tonight will be day 2 and I am making a promise to myself not to break this one…

This is so important for me, I have a condition called PTC and its not going to get any better, but the doctors say that the more I loose the easier it will be for my body to cope. Every time my blood pressure rises the more my head hurts, so you can imagine how it limits a lot of aspects of my life.

I am so thankful for the motivation and the inspiration all of you have to give, whether you know it or not, your journey that you share effects so many others!

By the way the baby sitting is going great, these kids really grab your heart strings….speaking of which I think little 3 month old Summer is filling up her diaper right now

Wish me luck!

Peace Always,

Leah♥

ps*

I used to be the chic who refused to own a scale, now that I am ready for this journey  I have to have one! I will start my weigh ins as soon as I get my hands on a scale

My friend had to help her Mom do some work out of town, I get to play with a cute little 3 month old baby girl and her 2 year old brother for the next 6 days with my own 3, that makes 5 little ones under my wing for the next week. This is the first time I have ever watched someones children for so many days, kinda makes me just a little nervous!

Maybe they will help keep me busy so I can finish conquering my little food addiction hehe…

Anyway wish me luck!

Peace,

Leah

*ps*

I love this place

Just joined this wonderful site and I am glad I did, I think I will be able to be not only more responsible with how I take care of my mind, body and spirit, but I will be able to track my progress and learn better ways to live and maybe even make a few friends along the way.

After loosing 40 pounds over the last 5 months I can finally see hope  and I can realize that I really can reach my goals.  It helps to have a special someone who loves you in your life, my man has been so loving, telling me how beautiful and sexy I am even if I dont really feel like I am sometimes….he gives me confidence and makes me very happy, he says he is the lucky one but he has no idea its the other way around….love is so important in this journey of life…

So I am looking towards a happy future, in a smaller pair of jeans

I realize now that we are all so very beautiful and special, one should never beat themselves up so much inside….I am glad to be free of that little demon!

Be sure to remember you are a special, beautiful Goddess, so treat yourself like one

Peace Always!
Leah ♥